Decisions, Decisions...

I t is hard to convey, unless you have had a similar experience, what it feels like to be told you have cancer. It is of course terrifying, but there is so much to do and so many decisions to make that you are quickly taken from fear to a place of business like proficiency. Due to my young age and my family history of breast cancer the first decision we made was to get genetic testing. It came back that I had a BRCA2 gene mutation. This led to my second decision which was to have a bilateral mastectomy. Being 27 and having people suggest that you have both of your breast removed is horrifying. And if you have the inclination to get on the internet and look at mastectomy and breast reconstruction results it becomes even more terrifying. Luckily I have an amazing husband who has stood by me through all of life’s challenges, and he was my rock through this one. I made the decision to remove both breasts because I didn’t want to go through this horrendous experience again and my gene mutation made the likelihood of a 2^nd breast cancer a real possibility. We met with a plastic surgeon and discussed all of my reconstruction options. I decided to use my own fat from my stomach to reconstruct my breast. This option didn’t use any of my muscles (which is a common reconstructive option) and it was my own fat so if I gained weight than my breasts would too. We couldn’t do this immediately so he coordinated surgery with my mastectomy surgeon and when she was done he placed tissue expanders. These would prepare my skin for the reconstruction surgery that we would do after all of my treatments were finished. Surgery left me with nerve damage and the inability to lift my left arm above my shoulder. (I had to have physical therapy to get it back) Also during the surgery they removed lymph nodes and it reviled that the cancer I had spread to five lymph nodes; this meant that my cancer was staged three. But all I was thinking was that I was going to kick it ass.   Bring on the treatment because I want to get this over with and move on with my life.